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A Window Into My Heart

In the blink of an eye she takes charge of my belongings, she heads straight to my makeup box and is audacious enough to try my mascara. Over and over, I see her natural leadership abilities and observe that her perception of beauty is being influenced as I stare at the bright colors of makeup on my 3-year old's face.  

Sweet, funny, and terrifying all at once, I ponder how this moment should unfold. I freeze, perplexed, and all I can think of is a quote on a hat I own saying, “Ain’t no hood like motherhood”.  I want to laugh and move-on, but inside of me a window opens and a conviction leads me to a golden opportunity. I get to correct and flip the script.

What script you may ask? Good question! The window of my heart begins to open and reflect a bright light on the problem, starting with the word ATTENTION. A precious moment in time when my 3-year-old had my undivided attention, and so profoundly so, that I even realized her actions were because of my lack of attention.

The word attention is a noun with two distinct definitions. The definition says, “Notice taken of someone or something; the regarding of someone or something as interesting or important or the action of dealing with or taking special care of someone or something.”

I confess that I often turn my attention to my job, emails, chores, and even social media. I walk motherhood as the victim of the hood, which is where I grew up, making it easier at times to fall into the trap of survival. I miss much of motherhood by not paying attention to the details in those precious moments, and send contradictions to my children on what is important by where they see me place my attention.

My heart’s conviction was to flip the script and begin to plant a seed in my daughter’s heart, one that would renew her mind on the true beauty that is assigned to her. I knelt down in order to be eye level with her, apologized for not paying attention, and shared my awareness of the bright colors on her face. I proceeded to explain that makeup is fun and something to look forward to, but more important than wearing makeup is allowing God to work in our hearts so we can be a bright light for Him.

Our goal is not to draw attention through our clothes or the makeup we wear, but to gain attention from the beauty that radiates from deep inside because of Jesus that lives in us. That moment was sacred. It was a moment where I got to flip the script because I was paying attention. Before my eyes I witnessed the importance of showing up, paying attention, speaking truth, and letting go. Part of me knows that this little one will have many temptations and trials in the coming years. And I am committed to paying attention and to being present in order to help her reject cultural patterns and redirect her to receive the Real Truth of beauty.

“Let your true beauty come from your inner personality, not a focus on the external. For lasting beauty comes from a gentle and peaceful spirit, which is precious in God’s sight and is much more important than the outward adornment of elaborate hair, jewelry, and fine clothes.” 1 Peter 3:3-4 (TPT).

As mothers, we have the privilege of becoming spiritual influencers in the lives of our children. We just have to be mindful to pay close attention to the patterns in front of us. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to rest and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

It’s very encouraging to see the power of His word flip the script not only for our children, but for the way we walk out the calling of motherhood. "Ain't no hood like motherhood” and thank goodness we can flip the script and walk victoriously in the power of Christ.


Erika Andrade

Erika is the wife of one adventurous warrior for 15 years, mama to 4 kingdom arrows (ages 3-12), Procter and Gamble manager for 17 years, and ambassador of truth and grace to many hermanas(os).

Above all, a daughter of the most high King made on purpose, for a purpose. She was born into a family with hard-working, Mexican immigrant parents who settled in the Chicago area where she was raised. She lived in Cincinnati, OH for 15 years and has been in Cape Girardeau, MO for 3 years.

She serves as the A&F Business Administrator and is passionate about creating kingdom warriors everywhere she serves.


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